Uh oh...you'll need new seat covers after the trip.
No Problimo...I will live up to my nick name. Along with fitting my passenger seat with an industrial grade condom, I will have an ample supply of TP, paper towels and wet wipes! My suggestion is that the better pole position on our caravan would be ahead of Crop Duster.
This reminds me of a story...
In 1973, two years after college graduation, a long time buddy and I drove to California and back on motorcycles to fulfill our high school boy's dream. The trip was successful in many ways but as one can imagine, there were several missteps which at the time were pretty traumatic but have made for entertaining "dumpster tales". One of those stemmed from the fact that we had little money in those days so high volume low cost food became our staple.
Somewhere around Texas or New Mexico we discovered Taco Bell. Remember this was 1973 and for East Coast boys tacos had not even been invented yet. We filled up on them and bean burritos at every opportunity. Unfortunately, my buddy's stomach did awful things to those simple foods. Even at 80 mph I would have a gagging reaction when I rode through one of his gaseous expulsions. I swear they had some kind of oil associated with them because once it entered my nose the horrid smell lingered for hours. I have no words to properly describe how sick those things were. They were more than just mere gas. They had rotten meat in them. Not only could they be tasted but I could actually see them before I was mercifully temporarily blinded. I digress. We finally get to Thousand Oaks, California where we stayed at the home of one of his Fraternity Brothers whose father was an executive at Walt Disney who gave us free passes to Disney Land. That's the good news. Turns out that Tacos were all the rage in California at the time. Being extra ordinarily good hosts for their son's friends, they served us all you can eat tacos for dinner prior to our visit to Disney Land. I'm sure you can guess where this story is going... I think it was in "It's a Small World" when he first launched one of those deadly suckers. Kids were crying, adults were gaging, teenagers were trying to climb out of the boat and I was attempting breath through the fabric of my shirt tail. Believe me when I tell you it was criminally ugly. The rest of the evening was more of the same...Magic Mountain, Frontier Land, Bear Jamboree, Pirates of Penzance, standing in line, everywhere, it made no difference and the crowd's reaction was overt. I swear they were calling for security to find and ouster the sick bastard that was dropping those putrid bombs.
The supply of which was epic. Absolutely endless. So much so, that we made him ride with his ass out the car window on our trip back to their home.
So Elder, I concede that Crop Duster's consistent performance is unequalled in my adult life's experiences, I have survived worse. My strong recommendation is that we avoid any Mexican restaurants on our upcoming adventure....which reminds me of a time in Danville, VA...
CB